How I met your father

Dear Ks,

Before your father starts telling you a warped story that it was me who shamelessly lured him into being his girlfriend (then) and wife (now), let me set the story straight. 

Long, long ago, in a dilapidated school, where Chinese culture was prevalent, a boy and a girl met. I had never imagined myself being in such an environment. I mean, dilapidated is bad enough -- Think toilet doors not having sufficient lightings and its wooden doors not having a lock. Sanitary conditions were deploring. What's more, the place was infused with students speaking in Mandarin. Nothing against that. In fact, ultimately I am pleased with the outcome -- A1 for Chinese! I'm Chinese, but growing up in an all-English speaking environment meant that I would be rather awkward in this school. My grades could have gotten me a place in some other schools, but nooooooo.... I had to go against my parents' wishes and choose this school which was totally unknown to me. (Please don't do that to me, dear children. )Why? Not because I knew it would be the place where I will find the man of my dreams. But it was all in the name of peer pressure. You see, back then, we had to choose our schools before our PSLE results were announced. It was a gamble. I followed the pack blindly. But alas, most of my friends received better results and were posted to other schools. Also, unbeknownst to me, most of their first choices weren't this particular cheena school, but were another! *HORRORS. So children, my advice is, don't follow the crowd blindly. 

So I was thrown into a dark abyss. Having to swim in a sea of strangers wasn't easy. Back in Secondary 1, I was next to this class filled with Ah Bengs (aka gangsters). The bunch of rambunctious boys often created havoc along the corridor. I didn't quite bother but there were a few punks who were pretty notorious and that caught my attention. One of whom was you father, who wasn't from that class though. I was rather appalled by their behaviour at times. Anyway, the following year, we were streamed and I was in the top class. Your mother is smart, my dears. Lo and behold, the notorious one aka your father, was also in the same class as me! Shocking! Ok, fine. He is quite a smart one, kids. But it was then, that I realised that he was different from the rest of the boisterous boys. At least he wasn't just some empty vessel. He was very vocal and smart and had extremely good rapport with the teachers. During the year, we hardly interacted but got a little more acquainted during an interclass swimming competition which I forced him to join, just to make up the numbers. He wasn't any eye candy in terms of physique in case you are wondering. I was also in the same ECA (extra curricular activity) group as his buddy which made our connection a little more comfortable.

Following that, we were classmates for 2 years. All these while, I didn't have a great opinion of him. I felt that he was probably one of those rich spoilt brats as he was constantly chauffeured to school in his parents' Mercedes or BMW and was always sashaying down the aisle in his Armani or United Colours of Benetton bag, with his socks pulled high and hmm I can't quite recall but he might have one of those plastic combs with a long tail stuck on his back pocket! How annoying is that? During those two years, he constantly teased me and amused me with his antics. I found it irritating, yet strangely, fun. I think it was because of this, my profile went up a notch. All of a sudden, all eyes were on us! Even my best friend came forth to ask if something was going on between us! No way! I didn't even entertain such thoughts because seriously, he was a menace. Once, when I was taking my siesta, he called to date me out for a movie. He caught me in the middle of a lovely dream and that put me in a foul mood. I hung the phone up rudely. Thinking that I was simply trying to be cautious/ worried that I was the only girl around/ trying to act coy, he got his buddy to make a second call and I was told that a girlfriend of mine was coming along! Ahhhh...that would have been a great tactic save for the fact that The girlfriend was in Malaysia then!

So things didn't take off. We went to our Junior Colleges respectively. On the first day of school, my eyes actually lit up and heart skipped a beat for a moment when his name was called out during the attendance taking. His name wasn't a common one hence it had to be HIM! I looked around the sea of uniforms but saw no sign of him. Disappointment sank in the pit of my stomach as here I am, once again, alone in a new environment. Nevertheless, life went on. We both got attached shortly after but they were just puppy loves. 

Fast forward, we lost contact for those two years but somehow got reconnected during my university days over the now defunct ICQ! Oh-oh! It was a messaging platform online, similar to watsapp or Facebook if you even have that in your era by the time you decide to read this space. He was in the army and probably was bored, hence would be online most nights. Me, being a night owl too (and bored) would also be online. We started chatting and one day, he asked if I wanted to go see some car show with him. Hmm...why not? Interesting to see if this Ah beng has changed. The last I heard, he had long hair during JC! So before we went to check out some fast wheels, we had a simple dinner at Far East Shopping centre and I was totally disturbed by his ungentlemaness, if there's even such a word. He did not offer to pay for the meal! Mind you, it was only a plate of curry rice so I am pretty sure his meagre salary from the army would cover it! So that meetup didn't go too great. 

That's Me, in the middle in case you can't recognise! We were are the airport sending his buddy (seated first on the left in the first row)

Shortly after, his buddy left for the States. It was a very late night flight and I joined him and a bunch of others in sending this buddy off. He offered to send me home that night. I think it was then that my opinion of him started to get a tad better for some strange reason. Maybe this spark was already in me, waiting to be rekindled. It was a love-hate relationship. I'm not sure. Love is quite a strange thing as you will learn. Each day, I would look forward to that "Oh-oh" and we would sometimes meet up for supper. Several a times, when I was staying late in school to study, he would even drop by my university to bring me out for supper. Mind you, he stayed in the east and I studied in the west! That's quite a journey! Even his mom started telling the kampong that something was fishy. Coincidentally, one of my seniors was his cousin! I only knew it when one night, they saw and acknowledged each other! The world just got smaller didn't it? 

Things progressed nicely and his charisma outshone his menacing ways. Yes, he still irritates me. So we weren't a couple until one fine night............

4th September 1998: He asked me out for a movie -- Blade. It was the most unromantic, stupidest show ever. I guess this nature of him tagged along over the years. It was some superhero show staring Wesley Snipes. Tell me about Batman or Superman, I'll probably appreciate. But Blade? huh? Who? And the venue was worse! It was at SHAW along Beach Road. He claimed that it was easier to get tickets over there. Well, OF COZ! the place was so shabby. I could have sworn it was his plot in getting me to fly into his arms and jump upon seeing a cockroach! ok, so, I couldn't quite remember the plot, but during the show, I felt that our arms kept nudging each other. There was a connection and it was a nice electrifying feeling. Then, while we walked out of the cinema, in pitch darkness, our fingers interlocked slowly. Just like that. The strange bit was, when we later bummed into one of our mutual friends right outside the theatre, our hands immediately loosened! It's as if we did something wrong! That night, we were out meeting a friend for supper and sensing that something was amiss, that friend asked if we were "going steady" gosh..is there even some new lingo the youngsters use these days? Steady means you are in a stable relationship with someone. That person may otherwise be known as your "stead". Anyhoots, we denied almost simultaneously. To me, it was probably a natural reaction as the whole world knew I was irritated by his mannerisms and now, all of a sudden, he was my Boyfriend? haha..It took me a while, quite a while, for the whole thing to sink in. But I must say, it felt good. Sweet dreams every night. I knew i could count on him like if I got myself drunk at some pub. In fact, there was once, a bunch of classmates and I were at a bash and I had a drop too much. I knew I was going to be a goner that night. So, I brought my girlfriend to a corner in the toilet, sat on top of a bin and instructed for her to call my boyfriend (your father). His number was deeply etched in my memory even though I was already way tipsy. The entire episode was later related to me by my gf who couldn't believe how coherent I was when rattling his mobile number. I guess, he must be the one then. :P. PS: Children, please don't be dead drunk or for that matter, get yourself into such situations as it can be really dangerous.

From that day, we called each other every night. Or rather, he, called me from camp every night. The poor dude had to queue up for the public phone until shortly after, he got a mobile phone. We went on several trips with friends and got to know each other even better. Children, please note that Mama here will only allow you to go overseas with your boyfriend/ girlfriend if it is in a big group! He used to be an Ah beng, but has mellowed down tremendously. His wits and humour makes me love him more and more each day. Our opposing character brought us closer. I am a hopeless romantic, living in fantasy while he is a practical person who doesn't give a hoot about your fantasies. Initially, I didn't take well to his sarcasms which he thought was humorous, but after a while, I grew to be just as sarcastic. 

Us. ROMed on 14 October 2006

Living up to our Ah Beng and erm Ah Lian name

Us. Married. 14 October 2007. Photos taken at the place where we met. I told you it was rich in Chinese culture! It was a truly memorable session to be taking our wedding shots at the school with a bunch of brothers and sisters who were mostly from the school as well.

It is a journey nothing short of amazing thus far with this man whom I call my husband since October 14, 2006. There were no fireworks kindof proposals from your father in case you are wondering because, given his nature, he'd rather take the more practical approach which was "Shall we go get a HDB"...-_-. He did, however try to give me a proper surprise proposal. He had to get his friend to give him bits of ideas and courage but the whole surprise was killed as he was discussing with the friend what to do when I was next to him! Yes, that's your father. Not very smart in the romance department. I have known him for 24years and counting and you could say that he is my bbff (bestest best friend forever). I am able to be me in front of him. Unpretentious and totally idiotic. We would bicker a lot but would always find a way to resolve the problem. He is often saying that I am the worm in his stomach. I can't rely on his for aesthetics, but I certainly can rely on him when I am in trouble or down. I will never forget the time he had dropped his work the moment he touched down in a foreign land, miles away and flew back on a 20hr flight the moment he heard that we lost the sibling you never met. I appreciate this man, your father, for the times he has been there for me. He has made several sacrifices and gives in to me frequently and for that, I thank him.

First there were three.....

Now, there are four.

Really blessed to have such a gorgeous family!

He has played a big part in giving me two beautiful children and for that, I thank him too (shhh, don't tell him, lest he gets swollen headed again). My dear Ks, I hope that you will each find the partner of your dreams and that he/ she will be someone whom you could confide in and rely on. Someone whom you can trust your life with. Someone who will love you for who you are and will love your parents of coz! Someone who is romantic yet sincere; Someone who is witty and not too irritating; Someone you love. But darlings, please don't let this day come too soon. Not when you are still in Secondary School ok?!

Love,

Mama

This post is part of the "How I met your father" blog train hosted by The Chill Mom. Join me and fellow mommy bloggers as we turn back time and get all nostalgic!

Next up, we have super momma, May from A Million Little Echoes:

"First of May marks their 9th wedding anniversary. Meyer and May were each other's first love and she was only 16 when they became an item. Fast forward 18 years later, they are now parents to two little imps. How did their mother meet their father? Find out more at A Million Little Echoes next!"